The Art of the Australian Insult


New tourism slogan
July 4, 2008, 5:43 am
Filed under: Celebrities, Politicians | Tags: , ,

“Tourism NSW should immediately contract be;linda Neal and Gordon Ramsay to front a new, more aggressive advertising campaign.  Called “Where the fucking hell are you, it would not only drag in the punters, but also keep those pesky waiters on their toes.”

Dave Robinson, letter to the Sydney Morning Herald, Friday June 13 2008.



Fight! Fight! Sydney vs Melbourne
June 25, 2008, 2:21 am
Filed under: Place | Tags: , , , ,

Revelations that Gordon Ramsay’s first Australian restaurant will be located in Melbourne led to lots of Melbourne-bashing in the Daily Telegraph. “AP” of Sydney offers:

“Being a Pom, of course he would choose a place where he would feel at home – cold, crime-ridden and full of whingers. Melbourne is perfect.”

“SM”, also of Sydney, was equally dismissive:

“That grey, cold, windy and wet town down south is welcome to this fool. TV cooks don’t do anything for me. However, it appears that this obnoxious prat is endearing to some. The whole foul language and bad boy image is so predictable and just a pretty shallow gimmick.”

“NIck” thinks that Melbourne is a bit up itself:

“Melbourne is too busy comparing itself to the rest of the world, although the rest of the world ha snever heard of Melbourne. When not doing this, Melbourne likes pretending it is Paris. Bleak City has a climate which makes a grubby little laneway seem like paraise. Sydney doesn’t care either way – we don’t try to be something we’re not.”

At least “George” stands up for Melbourne:

“Sydney’s food is crap. You can’t find a decent meal apart from a few posh places where you can’t get a table anyway. At least in Melbourne we don’t have the snobbery of Sydney.”

And “Rod” from Perth, who is presumably unbiased, says that Melbourne “wins hands down”:

“There’s not much to get excited about in Sydney. Pretty much the same as any other capital city.”



Gordon Ramsay offers up his thoughts
June 24, 2008, 10:38 am
Filed under: Celebrities, Lifestyles | Tags: ,

“[The public] aren’t wrapped up in cotton wool. We live in a very real life today. Scratch beneath the surface and it’s real. All the propaganda, all the bullshit and swearing, it’s the nature of the beast, it’s an industry language. We’re not necessarily proud of it, but it happens. It will happen tomorrow night when the  Socceroos play China – if they don’t win they are going to be classed as a bunch of fucking idiots. If they do win they are classed as great fucking football players.”

 

Gordon Ramsay demonstrates that he is as capable as anyone else of being utterly inane. He just inserts more F-words. Ramsay was mobbed by screaming female fans during his visit to Sydney. “It would be slightly different if I was a fat bastard,” he said on being asked about his sex appeal. Asked whether he has used Botox, he said, “Just look at my face – don’t be fucking stupid.”