The Art of the Australian Insult


“We don’t respect Gilchrist”
October 27, 2008, 12:38 am
Filed under: Sport | Tags: , , ,

“He should not be talking about Sachin. It is all rubbish. We don’t respect him. He pretends to be a saint and people say he walks when he nicks but we did he appeal when batsmen don’t nick? He always changes his mind according to a situation. If Australia is close to a victory he is always going up whether he is out or not out. We don’t need him to say these things just because he is retired.”

Indian off spinner Harbhajan Singh reacts angrily to former wicketkeeper Adam Gilchrist, who has questioned the integrity of Sachin Tendulkar in his new autobiography.  Gilchrist’s memoirs also reveals how hurt he was when Shane Warne called him an “arselicker”.

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“You dickhead, what are you doing?”
October 20, 2008, 4:02 am
Filed under: Sport | Tags:

“At night I’d lie there and go, ‘Shit, when am I going to see my kids?’ There were times I’d sit there and drink my mini bar until three in the morning just to get to sleep. Set the alarm, wake up and say, ‘Here we go again.’ I cried a fair bit when I was by myself: ‘You dickhead, what are you doing? What have you done?”‘

Shane Warne does not have happy memories of the 2005 Ashes tour.



Why is Shane Warne like Harvey Norman?
October 13, 2008, 7:00 am
Filed under: Sport | Tags:

“I’m like Harvey Norman – no interest!”

Shane Warne on whether or not he will make himself available for selection to the Australian team.



The McDonald’s of public relations
June 19, 2008, 8:39 am
Filed under: Celebrities | Tags: , , ,

“He’s the McDonald’s of public relations – but at least they do fresh salads. We don’t have any respect for the way he operates. If anyone rings us up and if they use his name, we won’t be in the deal.
We just have a view, that if you lie down with dogs, you’re going to get fleas.”

Anonymous PR practitioner on celebrity spinmeister Max Markson, who gave the world Shane Waren and Advanced Hair and Corey Worthington and Schoolies Week parties. Other strange promotions include Tania Zaetta, who allegedly consumed Lemon Detox Diet to cope with the stress of false allegations that she slept with troops in Afghanistan;  cancer sufferer and recovering alcoholic Derryn Hinch telling Australians to clean out their insides with All Bran, and eccentric actress Rowena Wallace, who scored a stint promoting Menoeze “for the relief of menopausal symptoms”, which in her case apparently included social security fraud.

markson

Image source: smh.com.au